涙の向う側に 幸せはあるの

This morning, my rabbit, Embryo died.

I guess I sort of saw it coming, but it doesn't make it hurt any less. I really needed something to take care of after Mom died, it's therapeutic for me to have something relying on me, but with Embryo dying as well, it hit a little too hard. I had a hard time, and am still having a hard time, with understanding at a baser level that I was not abandoned, that I did everything in my power that I could do for my rabbit. I know how illogical it is, but that is just one of the many joys of living with BPD.

I know that Cernunnos is watching over him now as he hops around in tall grass, eating clover flowers and basking in the sun. He is much better where he is now, than where he was. I also know that he died in loving hands and knowing that both of his Dads loved him very very much.

I worry about how March is going to handle being alone now, they were inseparable. We have had him outside a lot, letting him munch on dandelion leaves and just sit wherever he wanted. I hope he will  be alright. He has been having some similar issues to the ones Embryo presented that spurred us to take him to the vet. I cant afford another vet visit at the moment, not even close, but we are babying him and keeping a  close eye on him.


Sorry that this was my first blog post in well over a year, but I am not too sure how many people read this sort of drabble anyway.


-Joji